onlyeverdoubted | TLV Inbox

"There are worse ways of waking." He permits. "Perhaps we should try it first and not borrow trouble."

"Right, let's hope harassing me is still his life's work." And now he's the one taking refuge in the cats as a subject.

He nods, absently going to smooth out the bedspread.

"Do you have nightmares? Sleep apnea? Any odd nighttime behavior I should be made aware of?"

"S-sometimes. Nightmares, I mean." When he actually sleeps rather than knock himself out with bourbon or wander the halls all night. "I don't think it's, well, um, obvious. I mean, a problem for you. But I guess I wouldn't know if I thrash around. It's like knowing if you snore. Which I don't. Well, I didn't a few years ago, anyway, I guess it could have changed?"

That perplexes him.

"I don't know if I do or not either. It's been years since I've had to share a cabin." He admits. "How embarrassing."

"Mildly annoying at worst," Bodhi says with the confidence of only having a private room on the barge since she seventeen.

"If you insist."

He turns back to the bed, and drops down onto it, back first.

"It's not intolerable, your mattress. Far better than that chair."

"I just, you know, asked for... I can't take credit when..." This isn't quite Bodhi's usual nervous stammer. He's not cutting himself off so much as loosing threads to float off into nothing, preoccupied. There's something about seeing Hux stretched out in their--in a bed they intend to share. It's short circuiting anything else he tries to think about.

He doesn't seem to notice just yet, shrugging off his coat and wriggling to get a feel for the mattress in his shoulders.

"It's serviceable. The Admiral continues to be invasive enough to the point of memorizing the preferred mattress in my room."

He knows better than to suggest out loud that the concept of cuteness and the personage of Armitage Hux have anything to do with each other. Just one more thought to tuck away in a little twist of a flustered smile. The end of his ponytail twists between his fingers as he tries to figure out what amount of looking is weird. "That's... handy. Little creepy, but... Um, can't argue with the results."

"Mmn." He shuts his eyes, letting out a slow breath, in order to get a better feel for the room around him.

After a second he coaxes Huck up onto the bed, petting her as she sits beside him.

"Luxuries like this are...I suppose both a perk and a shameful indulgence still."

Bodhi finally quits hovering and sits down on the edge of the bed, still careful, though he's not sure what of. They're both here now, but it doesn't quite feel real yet. "If we work together, I bet we can, um, reconcile ourselves to the hedonism of... sleeping on a mattress."

He chuckles, still with his eyes closed.

"It's not just that. It's in a bed large enough for two, and a pet, and a warm, safe place. You don't realize how rare that is, some days."

Bodhi turns to look at him, still a bit stiff but feeling better that at least Hux isn't watching him behave like an idiot. "Maybe that's the ultimate luxury. Forgetting the rarity for a while." He's still babbling though, good.

Hux opens his eyes now, staring quietly at Bodhi before patting the other side of the bed, the side not occupied by the sprawling kitten.

"Come here, lie down."

Bodhi moves slowly because he's tempted to do quite the opposite. He'd always sort of assumed that only people in tawdry novels threw themselves at each other. A refuge in cliche for mediocre prose about not quite real feelings. But he'd like to now. Instead he stretches out next to Hux and honestly just means to take his hand. The sharp, tight, clinging hug is unplanned.

He makes a sound like the air swiftly escaped his lungs, surprised but not unwelcoming. Hux sets his hand on Bodhi's back between his shoulderblades, rubbing absently up and down.

His embarrassment finally loses out to the temptation to actually enjoy himself. He breathes out slowly, a soft little sigh just slipping out, and keeps clinging. "I, um, I- thank you."

"Please stop saying thank you. You don't have to every time someone shows you kindness." Hux grumbles, still with his eyes closed.

Bodhi considers, hesitates, takes a deep breath that's the more heartening for being against Hux's shoulder. He's about to try explaining an actual feeling and naming his own (already achieved) desires, and it's some effort. "Sor--i mean, let me try that again? I, um, I wanted this a lot, I probably n-never would have asked on my own, I mean, I wanted... to share my... my life with someone, like, in the-the abstract, but I never thought it would be building it around someone like this. I fell for you without even thinking it was possible anymore. For me, I mean, but also you're everything I want and I've never felt so much for anyone." Well, that was as messy as he'd expected.

That was probably the longest collection of words Hux has ever heard Bodhi say in context of their odd, homey relationship. He opens his eyes midway through to look over at the other, curious and with a warm feeling in the center of his heart.

Oh. This is what it's like to feel appreciated without being feared.

"I-I'm glad I could help." It was Hux's turn to stutter over his words.

Bodhi starts to look away and bury his face again, but he makes himself stop. He's still a bit uncertain, but he's now been ridiculous at length and there seem to be no negative consequences. "Just keep being you, I guess."

"Snide and aloof?" He jokes softly.

"Obviously." Bodhi shifts a bit to look up at him more easily, shifting his weight a little more onto Hux. "If you just want to be complimented for a bit, that's easy, I can do that."

He settles his hand back down to make sure Bodhi is comfortable.

"Much as my ego would like that, I don't think it lends itself well toward coming at this relationship as equals."

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject